Pirates D&D

Session 5
Poopin' on Pirates

The scene opens on a Saturday night, with little going on save resting. The Adventurer’s Guild convocation is tomorrow, and the party seems ill-at-ease to finish it and leave town before trouble comes looking for them. An overcast sky offers no benefit to their nervous disposition, but casts a sort of gloomy pallor upon the whole prospect of such a celebration.
Curious as to the motivations of Mira, Manus McElroy invites her to a pint of Guinness and questions her about her motives to adventure, and asserting that all adventurers have a cause, he inquired into her own. Although not utterly forthcoming, she assured him at the very least that her intents were companionship, and that she thought the party a fair enough bunch, and that she was a restless sort who took to wandering, and figured it was safer to do so in numbers, especially given the close call from just a few days before. Certain she was hiding something else, Manus shrugged and considered the answer sufficient for his own purposes, figuring to himself, “whatever doesn’t affect the crew, that’s private, that’s your own and nobody’s business.”

Despite the forcedness of their smiles at the convocation, they at least array themselves in pleasant attire and put on their best efforts to look the part, even if they seem to keep to themselves, avoiding contact with outsiders so as to quicken the process of leaving.
Within the hall of celebration many are gathered, with two adventuring parties standing at the high ground. One is our own, standing idly as they take the Adventurer’s Guild oath of honor and good conduct within the terms of the Adventurer’s Guild. Several seem to be missing, as only Blath, Manus, Mira and Segomo are present. As Anselm finishes a rousing speech, some of the more alert members notice a few furtive fellows sneaking around the rear of the amphitheatre. Hardly could they utter their suspicions before the loud blast of a cannon and a striking of artillery send a cannonball through part of the wall and colliding with and destroying the podium down below.
Instantly, panic ensues, and the second adventuring party, the Iron Boots, fails in courage before a challenge is even made to them. In a cowardly fashion they hide behind the crowds, hoping desperately to escape, while the brave heroes that we have grown accustomed to drew their weapons and met the enemy head on.

What to their surprise that they should see, it was Captain André LeBoucher, and four of his mangiest looking crew, dripping with the sweaty stench of overconfidence and presumption. As soon as he stepped foot into the conclave, Mira was already at assaulting his one-track mind, whispering haunting things to him, and causing him to turn coat and flee. If any of his crew or he himself were men of omen, they probably would have realized this to be a bad sign. But realize they did not, and they pressed on. Manus and Segomo quickly jumped into the fray, and were set upon by the pirates, whilst focusing all of their magic upon the Captain of the loutish bunch.
Within seconds, Segomo was knocked to the floor, but with Manus’ quick aid and the support of Blath and Mira, he survived and rose again. Anselm struggled against the wild crowds to get into the fray, but was unable to be of assistance, and would fail to help until the very end.
But the Captain could not withstand the constancy of the assault upon his person, and turned to flee. Manus, stepping past his enemies and grimacing through the pain of a cutlass finding purchase on his arm, drew his bow, took aim, and fired, knocking Andre to the ground, an arrow right between the shoulder blades.
Smiling grimly at his accomplishment, hardly had he turned away to join the fray again when the Captain was arisen. At this time also were men being buffeted by the thunderous spells of Blath. One of the unfortunate pirates fell down the stairs and right at the feet of Mira, who seized the opportunity to place her knife straight through his forehead.
Now death began to spiral out of control, as one pirate dropped after another, with the consistent fighting of Blath and Mira, felling another few of the pirates, even with Mira’s blade almost removing the head of one (a foreshadowing of things to come).
Manus aimed another shot at the fleeing once-proud Captain, and watched him stumble. Segomo then let loose his barbs and sunk the Butcher down to the ground. As Manus approached with his scimitar in hand, Segomo finished the wicked pirate with another few arrows while he lay in the stench of his defeat and shame, the worthy price for a life lived offensive to the world at large, and to the good order of things. Manus took his head with the blade, and holding it up to the world, the party began to chase after where the ship must be still docked.
Meanwhile, the populace in general proved themselves to be the saddest bunch of men and women, a lousy lot who cried out to the pandering of the foul and cowardly adventuring band for assistance, who soothed them with sweet words about how the heroes who had saved them from death would “soon be leaving, I’m sure.” Blath almost smiled at their diligence in attempting to save face, seeing as their pantaloons still hung wet from the failure of their bladders in time of peril. Almost smiled. Instead he gave them a look that suggested they were the worst sort of scum in this whole town, even worse than the scum within the festering boots of the now-dead pirates.

As they hound after the pirate ship, Manus tosses skillfully the head of Andre into a bush so as to better approach the pirates, attempting to parlay and navigate themselves into position with the ship they possessed. Mira started a light and fun song, and Manus held his arms up in peace, but the pirates would have none of it. It seemed that they were intent on setting off. The party headed to the dock where they confronted the enemy, lassoing the ship to make a route upon it, whilst Manus provided covering fire. Segomo stepped aboard as well to confront the two crossbowmen. Although one was felled, more replaced him, and Segomo was quickly dispatched. Blath slipped from the rope into the waters beneath, as the ship began to take wind and sail, and sensing the hopelessness of the situation, and feeling some guilt for permitting the debacle instead of arresting it, Manus called out for Mira to let go as well and to cut their losses.
Manus continued to provide fire, but he himself was struck to the ground. Mira managed to swim back to the shore unscathed and staunched the bleeding of her felled companion, then looked out to sea. Miraculously, Segomo had recovered and stumbled himself off of the ship, cutting a neat sort of dive, and Blath headed towards him to rescue him. Although the crossbowmen got another good shot off, Blath continued to support the helpless dwarf and float him a good way to the shoreline. The smelling salts buried in the dwarf’s beard awoke him once again and he took to the shore, immediately claiming the head of the one-time Butcher, then rifled through the remains of the dead pirates.

Sort of at a loss for being left behind, Mira managed to heft Manus up and some passers-by helped her carry him back off to the Shoreside Inn, where he was laid up to rest until he was conscious again. At this time he called out and found Mira who told of the events that happened afterwards, and of Segomo’s survival and Blath’s selflessness, which impressed the Irishman. Whatever answers he had not gotten by word from Mira that morning, he decided, was fulfilled by deed. Dalric and Katey had just arrived at the conclusion of her version of the events, and Dalric offered to afford dinner for all, as each explained the events of what happened. Each of them was grateful for the expense, and Manus invited them to all dine in his room by the fire, for he himself was too weak to go down the stairs and into the mainroom. And at this period of recovery and joyful friendship between our weary heroes, we take leave once again.

Session 4
De-Werewolfing de Werewolf
Friday Night / Saturday morning

Trying hard to appeal to the werewolf but ultimately failing, the party then turns to debate over what to do with the werewolf. Manus McElroy champions the cause of mercy and lawfulness, to which the party eventually agrees. In the midst of the moonlit night, Segomo and Homer the Great go out to the nearest temple, where they find a priest, Brother Calum, who is willing to trust a fellow man of the cloth, and follows the emissaries back to Anselm’s house, where Finnegan and Anselm wait expectantly. With solemn, ritual incantations and movements, Brother Calum removes the curse of lycanthropy from the werewolf, who is held until dawn when the city guard can come to arrest him. The guards inform the party there will be a trial before a magistrate on Monday morning, and ask them to testify.

The group doesn’t stay together long before Blath and Thok go out to the docks seeking excitement and mystery. A single ship is lit from below-decks, and Blath and Thok go nearby to listen in. They overhear a brief description of a reward for finding the party, and talk of a meeting Saturday night with Kendrick the Red to move their stolen goods — a meeting delayed from this night due to Kendrick needing to take care of some business that came up.

Later, Kathrine goes to find Dalric and interviews him about Kendrick the Red. Katey finds out that Kendrick is known to have a business relationship with the Butcher and reminded that she shouldn’t be seeking out information about Kendrick in such a conspicuous way as in public at the docks.

The party rests to await the convocation.

Session 3
Your HP or Your GP!

Leaving the sewer, the party decides to rest and freshen up, sharpening swords, repairing armor, eating, and drinking, as they ponder their next move. Blath ventures to the dock and works a short but grueling day loading and unloading ships while he scopes out opportunities to steal, pocketing some beef jerky and some small bit of wool, but dreaming of much larger things, like a whole sweater.

As the dinner hour nears, the party joins Blath at the dock to look for work and information. Dalric the Dockmaster approaches to help the party, informing them there will be money to be made during dinner with an audience of hundreds and a talented group of bards. He also informs them about Captain André LeBoucher, the pirate captain whose ship captured them not long ago. Dalric informs the group that André is powerful. Also upon being asked about Kendrick the Red, Dalric intimates in hush tones that Kendrick’s name is best not mentioned openly around these parts. The conversation dies down and the party performs for their food in an epically Homer-fied performance that leaves the fans begging for more Homer. They earn not only their food but a sizable sum of gold for their troubles.

Moving on, the party waits out the remainder of the day’s light and goes out, under the full moon, to check out the sewer, seeking an explanation for the bodies that lie therein. Noticing a sleeping panther in the trees of the wood near the sewer entry, the party gets into hiding spots, splitting up between the wood and the sewer itself — which still stinks vigorously of carrion. Hearing a wolf howl and the answer of a group of woods afar off, the party waits and waits some more, until, unnoticed, the panther sneaks up on Homer, revealing himself as Finnegan. He takes them into Anselm’s house, letting himself in with a key, and in the course of conversation comes off as a likeable but fearful druid. Finnegan informs them that a werewolf has been depositing bodies here, but chastises them as amateurs for not having covered their scents and thereby scaring away the very explanation they seek. They arrange to meet back here the next day with plans to mask their smells, and Finnegan promises to help them with information, but has been traumatized by werewolves in his past and will absolutely not be involved in fighting one.

Returning the next night under a waning full moon, Blath masks his scent by crawling inside the carrion crawler’s corpse and covering himself with its entrails; the rest allow Finnegan, in cat form, to pee on them, and then hide themselves in the loose dirt of the sewer. The werewolf, unaware, brings a fresh kill into the sewer, only to be attacked and quickly defeated by the party. He is not killed, but knocked out, bound, and interrogated, but not without biting both Katey and Blath. He reveals little else than the location of his gold with the promise that the party will spare his life. The party searches his home, finding a thousand gold worth of jewelry, art, and coin, and a note that says:

I have a job for you. Come to me to discuss. -K


Session 2
The Legend Continues

The merry men, and women, as they row, talk amongst another, lifeboats tied together so as not to drift. They discuss at length… should we go east? Should we go south? Perhaps southeast? After a wide-ranging, deep, satisfying discussion on the merits of easterly travel vs. the wiles and wonders of southerly travel, the crew decides to go south, staying a goodly distance from the coast and searching for a lonely place to come ashore without being seen.

The crew disembarks some distance from the quaint fishing thorp of Pemberton, hiding their boats and deciding to approach as though they belonged here. They walk up the hill where the town’s buildings are, singing and playing their instruments and in good spirits. Inquiring as to a good meal in exchange for a good song, they are directed down to the dock to speak with the fisherman. They walk past a dining hall and a small church devoted not to one god, but to all gods. The fisherman agree to host them for a meal, and some of the crew help set up chairs in the dining hall, while Kathrine stands by merely awaiting her fresh-caught meal.

Bidding Pemberton adieu, the adventurers walk the road to Roack, where the pirate captain had been taking them in order to sell them. In Roack, they rest up, finding bunkhouse style accommodation at the Piss Pot for most, quaint rooms at the Shoreside Inn for Manus, Homer, and Mira, and a luxurious penthouse suite at the Dragon’s Den for Kathrine.

Down at the Piss Pot, Segomo and Blath agree to the Piss Pot Challenge. The challenge is this: drink a draft of unknown contents from the Piss Pot (no pissing into the Piss Pot!), and if you finish it and hold it down, drinks and a night’s stay are free. As the rowdy crowd gathers round, Segomo raises the flagon to his lips. He smells turkey gravy, the faint scent of ale, and sees an unmistakable glob of mucus, but quaffs the drink without so much as a blink of the eyes. The tavern erupts in noise: shouts, applause, and the patrons knocking their glasses hard on the bar and tables. Next, Blath’s turn. Blath’s stomach swims as he raises the drink… he takes one sip, then a gulp… and it’s over; he vomits his entire stomach contents out with a violent wretch. The noise explodes even louder. Meanwhile, Thok makes idle chat with some of the drunker patrons and finds out about an illegal game of cards in the back room, which he joins (with no difficulty) and plays (with great difficulty), losing a few gold, but having great fun in the process.

Over at the Shoreside Inn, Manus tells stories to the assembled of ancient lands and heroes. While he tells a good story, the humdrum types of patrons there are only slightly gripped and engaged, not having had a good enough education to truly appreciate the intricacies of the tales. The innkeeper suggests he regale the Adventurer’s Guild tomorrow during their morning meeting at the Dragon’s Den lounge. Mira and Homer shop, sleep, and prepare for the next day.

Inside the Dragon’s Den, Katey tries to pass herself off as an author trying to write a book on the seedy side of life, asking if there are any tales of local criminals she can take notes on. The innkeeper points her to the concierge, and the concierge seems to accept as a matter of course that Kathrine is a woman seeking a thrilling, dark, sensual experience. She puts down a payment of 10 gold to purchase the “Strongheart package”. She has been silent on the matter since.

In the morning, the Adventurer’s Guild is simply enraptured with Manus’s fantastical legends and folk songs, and invite Manus and his friends into membership with the guild if they’ll complete an admittedly unpleasant task. Manus gathers the crew and meets back up at the lounge at noon, party in tow, to learn of the task. The party will be taken to a sewer to find the source of a horrible and unnatural smell that permeates the surrounding area, and remove its source.

Segomo boasts of how fearless he is and how easily he will dispatch this situation, so Anselm, in front of whose house the sewer lies, dares him to go it alone. He does so, getting unbelievably disgusting and stinky in the process, and is being absolutely shat on by the carrion crawler he encounters, when Anselm shows up and saves him just as he passes out.

Soon after, the party explores the sewer to the full, finding the loose dirt where the carrion crawler had tunnelled in, and a great mass of bodies in various states, none with money and all male but one. The party resolves to stake out the sewer next chance they get.


Session 1
Chapter 1: A Rough Start

Seven strangers sail on a passenger ship from the small fishing town of Cearo to Port Suranne, a bustling port city. They are:

Segomo, a male dwarven cleric
Manus McElroy, a male human bard
Homer the Great, a male human bard
Thok, a male half-orc rogue
Blath, a male human bard
Mira, a female human bard
Kathrine of Sagal, a female human sorcerer

The characters get to know one another during the 4-day journey. In the stormy darkness of the second night, a cannonball tears through their ship. Captain, crew, and party all are saved from drowning as the ship goes down, but in the open water their only chance for survival is the enemy ship that fired upon them, captained by a massive beast of a man. Party and passenger ship’s crew are taken aboard after surrendering what appears to be all of their weapons, and made to serve as slaves while the ship detours east by southeast to the great Isle Tagus.

Our intrepid adventurers work the crew, trying to keep their heads down and appeal to the humanity of the pirates, and it appears to be to no avail until one night, with the party locked away in quarters (and Segomo locked in the hole after a failed uprising), the pirates decide to have a little fun. The crew in their drinking and revelry lose track of time and caution, and unwittingly allow Manus to scout above deck when they invite him up to reminisce with them in Old Common about their shared ancestry in the north, what is now dwarven land. After many of the crew become tired and drunk, and as Manus is being led back to his cell, the party seizes the opportunity. Segomo racks one guard with radiant energy, knocking him unconscious before anyone realizes what’s going on. Put down by a well-aimed crossbow bolt, Segomo begins bleeding out while Manus gives first aid to the downed pirate as another pirate looks on with crossbow. Meanwhile, Katey and the rest of the party pick the lock at the quarters and ambush the remaining guard, causing a commotion when they cast not one but two thunderous waves of energy, knocking the remaining guard down. Almost killing him but seeing their chance to escape, the party lights a fire in the quarters to distract the captain and the rest of the waking crew, and jumps over the side of the ship to lifeboats, escaping toward the only available light on the horizon, a lighthouse just under a mile away. Before they leave, one last look at the pirates’ ship reveals the fire has been extinguished and the magical light in the crow’s nest has gone out.

What remains of the passenger ship’s crew is a mystery, but they were not seen nor heard during the uprising.


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